Tuesday, November 29, 2005

What's The Story

I don't usually answer getting to know questionnaires but this one is a little different from the others so I was inspired to answer :) Got this from a friend's blog:

What's the Story:

[01] of your name?
* My mom's nurse was a Catholic nurse. The day I was born, she told my mom that it was the feast day of Our Lady of Lourdes. Thus, "Lourdes". My dad decided to add "Vida" in, which is Spanish for "life".

[02] of your parents?
* I'd say it's more like Romeo and Juliet or "you and me against the world". Hehe. Conflicting families and they ended up eloping.

[03] of your last birthday?
* Went to mass at Retiro, had dinner at Pazzo, bowling at Rockwell and finally coffee at Seattle's best.

[04] of your first love?
* See previous blogs entry. Hehe.

[05] of your room?
* Pink. That's my room theme color. Got cool pieces from Ikea, my favorite of which is my bedside table lamp. I have full length windows, and a good view of the pool. Leaving this room in a couple of month's time as we're moving in February.

[06] of last christmas?
* Every Christmas Eve, we have a tradition of drawing lots to figure out who gets the honor of putting the star on top the tree. Last year, I wasn't as lucky. It was Rafael who got the price.

[07] of last valentine's day?
* DVD night (showing "Got to Believe") at our Kingswood apartment. Plus busy preparing for the Singapore move.

[08] of the first time you saw your crush?
* All I remember is that he had on the cutest smile. Hehe.

[09] of you and your best friend?
* We met at the Ateneo, my roommate all 4 years of college. We used to go to the dorm rooftop when we wanted to talk about secret stuff... I wrote her a letter dated 17 April 1997 which she still has and is major blackmail material. She's my bestfriend, MQ ,and future MOH.

[10] of the last place you went to?
* Al Dente Tretoria @ the Esplanade to celebrate Tegs' birthday. It was a real cool place.

[11] of the last time you cried?
* The last time I really seriously cried... Hmm... October 10th. Let's not go into detail :)

[12] of your greatest achievement this year?
* This year is about self-discovery. I'm proud to have kept my sanity through it all (well, except for certain, brief, and hopefully acceptable moments of insanity). Hehe. As this year is coming to an end, I have a clearer sense of what I want, what I can/cannot compromise and what really matters.

Monday, November 28, 2005

A Whole New World

Sweat White.That was Saturday's theme. One of Tegs' friends, DJ Travis, from Manila was spinning at this club called "Happy". It was a one night event so we decided to check it out.

Music-wise, it was a blast. Travis was quite good. It was entertaining to watch him spin the records and dance at the same time. He seemed to be having so much fun tinkering with the mixer. DJ's have a real cool job.

The place was also nicely done. The dance floor is covered with foamy stuff and almost everyone was in white. There's this huge sea of hunky men - good looking, buff, fashionistas. BUT, here's the thing (yep, with men, there's always a catch :) )... they were out searching for hunky men as well!

Oh ya, "Happy" is not your usual club. I haven't been anywhere where testosterone levels are so high yet there's really no danger of being harrassed. Hehe. You can walk around naked and they really won't care. Really!... And where else do you see shirtless men dancing the ledges? 6 packs, great obliques, good dance moves... Walk-in comfort rooms with no walls... Take away loot bags with what else - condoms. (That's right, be safe).

Among other things, though, the most interesting fact of the night is that it validates (without a doubt) Madonna's status as THE icon. When "Hung up" was played, everyone flocked the dance floor as if it were a national anthem. Seriously :)

In sum, it was a pretty interesting night. I guess it's good to open one's eyes sometimes and be immersed in a world totally different from one we are used to. It makes one understand that there's more out there to see.

To each his own... as long as everyone's enjoying... and everyone's "happy" :)

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Sink 'N Swim

I was listening to Plumb's "Sink 'N Swim" and I just started writing...

Sink 'N Swim

Cold. Dark. Numb.
Sucking me deep,
The whirlpool was too strong
...emotions too high
That I've lost control.

Lower than I've ever been
Sunken ship,
...Is there hope?
Broken spirit,
...Will rescue come?

A burst of color,
A show of support,
A shower of love.
Giving me inspiration,
I begin to see there's light.

With all the strength I have,
... moving my legs
... gasping for air
... inching my way to the surface
I tread the deep waters.

Floating. Breathing. Swimming.
I'm still alive.

Monday, November 21, 2005

First Love

"First love never dies" - Unknown

Circa February 1993. Prom night. I was sitting in my peach gown when "King and Queen of Hearts" (so retro!) suddenly plays and I felt someone tap on my shoulder. My heart dropped when I saw it was Erwin asking me to dance. Lightheaded, I let him lead me to the dance floor, where in mid-song, he hands me two roses - one pink and one white...for my birthday and for prom, he says. It made my night.

It's funny how such little things can make the heart flutter. I guess in my 15 year old infatuated mind, Erwin was that prince in shining armor. He was first to make me feel what being "in love" means and oriented me to my first"heartbreak". High school wouldn't have been the same without him.

Last Saturday, he woke me up with a text message, announcing that he's in Kuala Lumpur and will be flying in Singapore that same afternoon. I haven't seen him in around 3 months and so we arranged to meet up.

We had dinner at a restaurant on top of Mount Faber which was reachable through cable car. Overlooking the city and dining al fresco, dinner by candle light can be described as perfect, and almost quite "romantic". My 15 year old self could have only described that night as a "dream". But, really, it was a great time spent with one of my best friends.

Ya, best friends...People from high school will probably be surprised that we ended up being close. Sometimes I wonder too how we've come to evolve. From barely talking, we've managed to form a real, strong friendship. He has grown to be that friend I can talk to...and just be still with. We can talk a lot or be quiet drinking our Guiness and it will still be a good time. Like Pi, I know he'd be constant through all life's changes - his and mine.

As that friendster testimonial goes, I will always be his drinking buddy who doesn't drink, and his yosi buddy who only smokes second hand :) (Dude, I tried but it just doesn't work for me. Hehe.)

I guess I would have to agree with that saying...

(First) Love never dies. Sometimes, it just evolves.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Transparent

Rhea and I had lunch at Long John Silver's yesterday. They had a promotion where one had to pick a card from the dish bowl, scratch and see if they win a price. I really have no luck with such things and so my card read: "Thanks for dining. Enjoy your meal". I wonder if anyone really wins.

Today, Keith and I went to Yoshinoya for lunch. An interesting challenge came about wherein I had to sport the "I-am-not-thinking-anything" look whenever an idea is presented. This is because of several instances when he'd say "I sense something is wrong" or "Spill it", without me even saying a thing. I guess he knows me enough to know what's up.

But, this led me to think...Am I that transparent? Am I a dead giveaway? Hmmm.

Maybe.

Maybe, I do come across as that gal - "what you see is what you get" - and for the most part that is true. I say whatever I want to say (most of the time). I do not pretend I like you if I don't (and if I do, you'll know). I can neither keep a straight face after "stealing" earphones nor can I put on a happy front when it's chaotic inside.

However, what some people don't get is that the tag line should read - "what you see is what you get BUT that's not entirely it". Not at all. There are some (important) things - my reasons, fears, desires, future plans - which I seldom talk about and only a select few know.

And so, I really find it interesting how some people think they know me entirely to form a solid judgement about my life. Little do they know that beyond that easy to read English title page is a whole lot of Greek words that aren't as simple to decipher ;)

Like that Long John Silver's promo card, they have only scratched the surface...

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Inspiration

A friend commented that my aura is different nowadays and that I'm lovely as ever. Ahhmm. Thanks I guess. Hehe.

The answer...inspiration. It's like fuel which makes the engine run smoother (oh gawd, that's such a bad analogy :) )...or olio cheesecake which complements a good meal...plasma tv which enhances one's viewing pleasure...a good session at the spa which revitalizes...or the i-pod which makes the long MRT rides entertaining.

With inspiration, an insomniac can get uninterrupted sleep and wake up refreshed. With inspiration, a writer can dish out pieces without even trying. With inspiration, the bad seems a little better, and the good seems great.

Thus, I say:

Draw inspiration from things, no matter how simple they may be... a cool song you've heard on the radio, moves from dance class, a yoga pose which you finally get, a great restaurant you've recently discovered, a deep quote you accidentally stumble upon, even a 120-item gap report.

Draw inspiration from people... old friends who continue to care, new friends who bring in more laughter, family who'll always be around regardless, and most especially yourself - the only person who will be with you through it all.

Inspiration. 1 tablet, 3 times a day. Guaranteed to make you glow.

.... I guess I'm inspired huh. Hmmm... :)

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Quote of the Day

Sometimes life isn't always exactly the best paved road. Sometimes you have to take many detours before discovering the real path to your true destination.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Singapore

To be honest, my move to Singapore was a decision not thoroughly thought of. It was a drastic attempt to change things, hoping that a new life will bring the peace I was looking for. Things fell into place easily - the job, the apartment, and new friends. The fresh environment and great company softened what could have been a really rough blow. It was not a perfectly smooth transition.

This morning, however, I woke up and it feels different. I'm not really sure what has changed (ok, maybe I know a little :)). But, for the first time, I feel like I am really meant to be here...and that the hopes I've had for this new life may be realized after all.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Breathe Easy

Last Thursday was kinda rough. I couldn't breathe....and I mean literally. This is the first time I've had an attack in a lonnngggg time. From having zero attacks in the last 10 months, I have ignored my once much needed inhaler and didn't have it in my purse. Big mistake! I had to rely on coffee to open up the airways. What's worse is that I had a 3 hour meeting that day, which I was driving. It was a total effort to be talking that long.

When I got home, I immediately had 3 puffs of that refreshing Ventolin drug and got a much needed rest. Lying in bed in relax position, I had the closing routine of yoga class playing in my head -- "Relax the body. Relax the mind. Breathe in, feel the air filling your lungs. Revitalizing air. Breathe out, releasing all the tension. Breathe. Breathe".

I couldn't say that this incident is totally unexpected. It is my brief flirtation with cigarette smoke that caused this. For the past couple of weeks, I've been exploring "Marlboro Lights country". Nothing major, just a smoke here and there, but I guess I'm just really not made for it. I'm stopping.

I resolve to stick to the one vice alone - Writing.

I will take in everything around me - beauty, pain, joy, fear, love...breathing them in. Then, I will write, letting the thoughts flow seamlessly like exhaled air.

I will write... and breathe easy.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Sweet November

It was a good way to start the month. My girls came over for a 4 day break. Days were packed with sight seeing, shopping, good food (chili crab!) and laughing (yep, lots of laughs). And our nights... oh our nights were something else. It was a myriad of weird games, booze, good music, great company... and ya, a few noticeable, cute (no, make that hot) boys (nay, men) too. Hehe.

Some of the highlights:

1) Marlette in a skirt - Wow. Really. Girlie girl galore.

2) Cable Car ride - Two words - Tilted. Freaky...but definitely generated some good laughs. Shay and I are getting old to be scared this easy.

3) Our inventive card games, charades and taboo - Word: Blackhole: "It is a place not on this earth. It is used to describe nothingness, (long pause), emptiness". Hehe.

4) Insomnia - Pinoy band rocked the house like a fully jammed Sting concert. This is where we had our first Singapore Sling... and where we met Mr. Absolutely Gorgeous.

5) Shay going on a dare - Let's just say that she wore a garment less than the usual :)

6) "Emergencies" - Lette in Suntec. Shay in Esplanade. Rhea should've been immuned but somehow, she had to grace Underwater World with her presence. Hehe. Till now can't figure out if it's the water or the coffee. Hmmm.

7) Our henna tattooes and jelly rings - Sentimental girls we are. Souvenirs we got, but memories from this trip will be etched in our minds for always.

It was a great time. Probably, the best time I've had in months. I'm really blessed to have friends who will be around for me regardless.

....

Yet again, I'm borrowing one of Carrie Bradshaw's lines: "Our past is like an anchor that keeps us from moving on. Wouldn't you wish you can say that this ship has sailed?"

As I promised Keith, November 1st is going to be the day. Well, actually, I kinda slipped. It was November 2nd. This ship is beginning to sail. Slowly, but surely.

Anchors away.